By: Andrew Carmichael
It is very hard to find a couple who have been married for more than half a century, but that does not mean the task is impossible. At Gay Park in Providence, Greater New Amsterdam, a couple have recently celebrated their 60th wedding anniversary.
Ramish Maraj and his wife Chandrawati, who is called ‘Aunty Chan’, are now both 80 years old, and even though they have been married for 60 years, they say they do not know what love is.
“I know what is respect. I know what is trust. I know what is faith, and I know what is commitment in a relationship,” Aunty Chan related to INews in an interview. “We love each other dearly, and this didn’t happen overnight,” she added, while noting that their coming together was a result of an arranged marriage.
Ramish Maraj’s father had, in 1961, seen young Chandrawati singing at a religious function and had immediately asked for her hand in marriage to his son. Without hesitation, her parents had agreed. Sadly, Maraj’s father passed before his son got married. Nevertheless, the young lady’s parents had honoured the commitment.
According to ‘Uncle Ramish’, he had seen his wife only once before the wedding day, and that was two years after the agreement had been made.
At that time, he was living on the East Bank of Berbice and she was living in Campbellville, Georgetown. Seeing her for the first time had not even been planned. In fact, he had ridden past her house and gotten a glimpse of her as she was exiting a motor car. “She was coming out of the car to go into the Mandir, but she did not see me,” he explained.
He had thought she did not see him then, but during the interview, she confirmed that she was too shy to look at him.
Now both elderly, the man related that his wife had made a lot of sacrifices in the early stages of their marriage. Speaking about those sacrifices, ‘Aunty Chan’ recalled that one of the biggest sacrifices was leaving her home in the city to move to Rotterdam in Berbice, where Maraj lived at the time.
Reminiscing on their wedding day, she recalled that the moment he held her hands, all the shyness had disappeared. “We never spoke before the wedding, but when he held my hand, I knew this was it…” she recalled. “It wasn’t that easy as I am telling you, it took a lot of willpower and commitment,” she recalled.
Their union has produced two children.
Asked if there was anything she would change about her husband, ‘Aunty Chan’ chuckled and replied, “At first, I wish I could get him to come to Mandir more and pray, but I couldn’t. Now it doesn’t matter anymore; it just happened. He goes to Mandir with me, and even when I can’t go, he would still go.”
When the same question was posed to ‘Uncle Ramish’, he also chuckled, and said his wife had given him too many privileges. “She gave me all the privileges,” he said, as tears of joy settled in his eyes.
On the question of advice to young couples, the 82-year-old man, who operates a chemical retail business, responded that couples must respect and understand each other. “You have to keep good company…must have good thought and sense of imagination; and, more importantly, live a simple life.”
For her part, Aunty Chan encourages young couples to stay committed to the relationship, have respect for each other, be faithful to each other, and trust each other. However, she remains convinced that one of the most important factors to living a happy married life is for couples to have the blessings of their parents.
